I felt inspired to conduct a search on ChatGPT about the frustrations, desires, fears, issues, and concerns that we have, as well as the resources we need to feel connected, understood, loved, supported, healthy, organized, efficient, balanced, grounded, fully present and able to handle whatever life presents.
Whew. That’s quite a list!
Table 1: Women attorneys without children.
Table 2: Women Attorneys with Children
What impresses me with this search is the commonality of our experience, the sameness that unites us. It’s the feeling that I am not alone. We are not alone, and that moves me.
When I was three years out of law school, I decided to open my private practice in Lakewood, Ohio. I found an office-sharing arrangement with two other attorneys and an employment agency and retained a legal secretary who was contracting out her services to several other attorneys. I’m dating myself. I also joined a women’s business group that met monthly for food, drink, introductions, and support and started advertising my services.
In my first month as a solo practitioner, I discovered that I was pregnant. I was feeling ready to be a mom, but it was a bit of a shock because the contraception that had been working for years suddenly ‘failed’. I had no idea how I was going to get my business off the ground and be a first-time mother. I wish I had had a group like the CWBA back then; but somehow, I managed to rise to meet the challenges and gifts that presented in my life as we all seem to do, sometimes gracefully and sometimes through a more circuitous journey.
I sold my business when my son was 9 and moved with him to Colorado to become a partner in a small boutique firm. We’ve all had twists and turns that opened doors in our lives, and this was one of mine.
The women’s business group that I joined was like a tiny first step of what is now the CWBA with all its committees, events, groups, and opportunities to connect, be of service, give back, and receive. I am amazed at the depth and welcoming nature of the women that I’ve met, and how we function as a cohesive whole with diversity and the many ways of viewing and experiencing life.
There is a commonality that unites us all, and I’ve felt that when attending On What Grounds? A Virtual Leadership & Community Café. At a welcoming meeting for new members that I recently attended, Emma Garrison shared that she loved On What Grounds and looks forward to participating every month. I love it, too. The women who come, share their experiences, stories, and insights with authenticity and vulnerability. It’s so refreshing.
Circling back to the ChatGPT tables: The Resources section is about embracing ways to support ourselves, and I’d like to add with loving-kindness. As a group, we tend to be hard on ourselves, placing unreasonable demands and expectations on ourselves, and leaving little if any room for mistakes. Perfectionism can leave us feeling isolated and alone, even in a crowded room with friends, family, and peers.
So, here’s my offering:
To break the cycle, we can align to loving-kindness. We need breaks to nourish our body, mind, and soul. If we don’t take the time to walk, run, exercise, take a bath, talk to a friend, breathe, let go and be with ourselves and the people we like and love, it’s not going to end well.
It’s not selfish to incorporate self-love and self-care habits that fill us up and give us the strength, tenacity, and willingness to handle whatever life presents. We can set reachable goals and start by taking one step forward and then another, acknowledging ourselves and every small victory along the way. We can step into the CWBA for understanding and support, acknowledging that we are better together.
It's not the destination, it’s the journey that counts. Aligning to loving-kindness refreshes our work-life balance and fosters harmony within. It enables us to give and receive from a full and overflowing heart.
Arlene Cohen Miller is an A-V Rated Colorado Attorney, a Professional Certified Coach with the International Coaching Federation, a Coach-Facilitator with Ingomu, a National Coaching Company, and the CEO of Jewel Consultancy where she offers coaching, mentoring, and soul readings.
As a Work-Life Harmony & Balance Coach, Arlene brings a wealth of training and experience to help you compassionately and wholeheartedly lead yourself and create the life that works and feels right for you, a life where you experience less stress and more patience, kindness, and peace; a life where you experience more contentment and joy.
Arlene facilitates virtual group coaching sessions to boost the confidence and self-esteem of corporate employees and university students as a coach-facilitator with Ingomu.
Arlene has a Diploma in Transformational Holistic Counseling (Australia) and is a Certified Meditation Facilitator.
Arlene is the recipient of the President’s Cup for lifetime service with the Commercial Law League of America, where she served in many leadership positions including Chair of the Creditors’ Rights Section, Chair of the Western Region, Arrangements Chair for the Western Meeting, and Board Representative for the Creditors’ Rights Section.
Arlene also offers Transformational Healing & Heart Alchemy Mentoring. Mentoring is about healing yourself from the inside out, knowing how to fill yourself with love, the unconditional love that you need to let go of fears and judgments that have been holding you back, and keeping you small.
As a Mentor, Arlene offers individual Soul Readings as well as group Soul Readings at social and business gatherings, parties, and events. Soul Readings offer you a rich, healing journey into a bigger perspective of what matters: the opportunities open to you and how to best take advantage of them; the support available to reach your goals and create the life you desire; and the simple tools and skills you need to create the clearest, brightest future.
For more information, please contact Arlene at 720.936.2634 or arlene1@jewelconsultancy.com
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